BALTIMORE — While searching for love this Valentine’s Day, don’t fall into a trap. Americans are losing millions to romance scams.
On average, victims of romance scams lose tens of thousands of dollars. They go all in with their hearts and bank accounts only to learn they’ve been lied to.
In the past few years, WMAR-2 News Mallory Sofastaii met with men and women who shared their stories about the person who changed their lives.
“He’s the perfect guy, he says the right things. He makes me feel good,” a woman told Sofastaii after losing $75,000. She requested to stay anonymous because she hadn’t told her family about the scam.
“It’s like claws in you that you can’t seem to get out,” a man revealed after losing $15,000 to a romance scammer.
“They’re very good. They manipulate minds and they clearly know what they’re doing and they’re intentional,” said Angie Kennard, whose father was the victim of a romance scam. “They got over $700,000, at least it's what they stole from my father. He had nothing left to the point where he stopped taking care of himself.”
These high losses aren’t unusual. In the last year, the FBI’s Internet Crime Complaint Center (iC3) received more than 19,000 complaints about confidence/romance scams with reported losses approaching $740 million.
In Maryland, 350 victims reported losing $15.6 million, an average of nearly $45,000 per victim, and that’s just the people who reported the crime.
“These are people they trust. These are people they believe they have a genuine relationship for, so a lot of them are embarrassed, they don’t want to tell us that this has actually happened, so it becomes very complicated,” said Thomas J. Sobocinski, Special Agent in Charge of the FBI Baltimore Field Office.
SAC Sobocinski added that these predators are local and international.
“These are professionals. I want people to understand that this is a well-organized group and network of individuals all over the world that are preying on certain people,” said Sobocinski.
And they’re skilled at grooming their victims, typically, multiple people at once. They develop these relationships over several months then come up with a reason for why they need you to send them money such as a loan, an emergency, or an investment opportunity. They craft excuses as to why they can’t video chat or meet in-person, and they reel in their victims taking as much as they can until they have nothing left to give.
“How much money did you end up giving him?” Sofastaii asked another victim who requested to stay anonymous.
“$94,330,” she responded.
“All told, I gave him $39,000 and had nothing myself, nothing,” said Kate Kleinert.
In these scams, it was the desire for connection that clouded victims' better judgment.
“Has anybody fallen in love? And if you’ve fallen in love that’s what we’re talking about. And so, these people believe that they’ve had this relationship,” said SAC Sobocinski. “And when somebody betrays that that makes you second guess your actions the rest of your life.”
According to Sobocinski, the FBI has been successful in recovering funds, but it’s important victims come to them as quickly as possible.
The first step is notifying your bank then filing a report with the FBI’s Internet Crime Complaint Center at www.ic3.gov or call 1-800-CALL-FBI (225-5324).
While the FBI has a threshold for the cases they investigate, they’re asking all victims to report this crime. Even if a case doesn't meet their minimum, it could be part of a larger pattern that helps them find the people responsible.
If you develop a relationship with someone you meet online, the FBI recommends you follow these tips and beware of the red flags:
- Think twice before you share personal information online. Scammers can use details shared on dating sites and social media platforms to better target victims.
- If you try online dating, only use dating sites with well-known reputations. Search people’s photos and profiles online to see if anyone has used the names, images, or information elsewhere.
- Beware of online suitors who try to isolate you from your family or friends.
- Don’t send money to someone you’ve never met in person.
- Go slowly and ask the other person lots of questions.
- If you notice older family members using new communications apps or dating sites, explain the red flags and pitfalls so they don’t fall victim to these criminals.
- If you suspect your relationship is a scam, stop all contact immediately.
