In case you didn’t realize it, The Bachelor is all about fighting for a fiancé.
It’s not, as villain Corinne pointed out Monday night, about fighting for a pickle.
I mean, The Pickle doesn’t have quite the same ring to it.
As Good Morning Maryland’s Christian Schaffer and Megan Knight discussed in this morning’s Facebook Live, The Bachelor has become the Corinne Show, which much of the two-hour episode devoted to the spoiled 24-year-old’s antics. Are you sick of it?
I’m not! It’s great TV.
The episode began with Vanessa confronting Nick about Corinne’s behavior, which has included sleeping through a rose ceremony, stripping off her bikini top in front of him and making out with him inside a moonbounce. Nick assured Vanessa he takes her feelings seriously, and she seemed to believe him. At the rose ceremony, Nick sent Christen and Brittany home. Both sobbed to the camera about their fears of being alone. Please. They are all of 25 years old. I think they’ll be OK!
Next, the remaining 15 ladies learned they were leaving the Bachelor Mansion in L.A. to travel to – Milwaukee, Nick’s hometown! They all screamed with excitement, and it was the first time I’ve ever seen anyone so happy about a trip to Wisconsin.
Danielle L. – who won the group date rose last week on the Backstreet Boys date—got a one-on-one with Nick. It was a fairly boring date until they bumped into Nick’s ex, who was most definitely a producer plant. She told Danielle she dated Nick for three to four months, years ago. In other words, who cares. No drama whatsoever, and the ex wished Nick well. Then Danielle and Nick went to see country singer Chris Lane (no relation to Neil Lane, engagement ring designer to the Bachelor franchise.) Danielle got a rose.
The group date seemed like a vehicle to showcase Corinne’s brattiness. The group of 11 went to a dairy farm where they had to milk cows and scoop manure, and Corinne whined that she’d rather be at a spa and wanted some sushi. (Uh, I’m on her side here.) Then she complained about a hand injury and refused to do any more work. Later, the others told her they thought she was immature, and asked if she believed she was ready to get engaged to a 36-year-old man.
“Do you call this immature?” Corinne said in an on-camera interview, grabbing her breasts.
Nick gave Kristina, a Russian-born dental hygienist, the group date rose.
Raven, the fashion boutique owner from Arkansas, got the second one-on-one date, during which she got to meet Nick’s parents and his youngest sister, Bella. That’s a lot of pressure for a first date, but hey, it’s The Bachelor! The couple went to Bella’s soccer game and then they went roller skating, and the latter was one of the most natural, fun dates I’ve ever seen on the show. No random hot tubs, no silly gimmicks, just two people having a good time in an old-school roller rink.
The skate date was followed by a fancy dinner, and Raven confessed she walked in on her ex-boyfriend cheating on her—so she beat him WITH A STILETTO. OK, Raven is my new favorite here.
She got a rose. I don’t see her going anywhere anytime soon.
After Raven and Nick’s one-on-one date concluded, it was back to The Corinne Show. Corinne complained that the others were ganging up on her for napping, noting that Abraham Lincoln napped, too, (uh, I guess he probably did?) and said they were being fake.
“I can’t even,” Corinne said to the cameras. “I literally can’t even.”
The episode ended with a showdown between Corinne and Taylor, the Johns Hopkins grad and mental health counselor who told Corinne that she has low emotional intelligence. Corinne didn’t react to that well, and threatened to punch Taylor.
Because that’s what an emotionally intelligent woman would do.
Can’t wait to see what happens next week!
Watch The Bachelor Mondays at 8 p.m. on ABC2.