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The Bachelor: Tears and tantrums in Bimini

Posted at 2:06 PM, Feb 15, 2017
and last updated 2017-02-15 14:06:39-05

The Bachelor made a historic announcement Monday night after the most recent episode aired—and I don’t just mean announcing that lawyer Rachel Lindsay would star as the first black Bachelorette ever.

RELATED: ABC's next Bachelorette will be show's first black lead

Instead, ABC at least partially gave away the ending of this season of The Bachelor. Since Rachel has been confirmed as the next Bachelorette, we know Nick is sending her home—though she’s now one of the four contestants still in competition for Nick Viall’s heart.

The show reportedly forces contestants to sign non-disclosure agreements that prevent them from spoiling the outcome of the show before it airs. So the fact that ABC, in effect, spoiled Nick’s season is unprecedented.

Monday night’s episode began with the six remaining women—Rachel, Raven, Vanessa, Danielle M., Kristina and Corinne—emotional after Nick told them he wasn’t sure he could find his wife on this “journey.” But after a heart to heart talk with show host Chris Harrison, Nick seemed to find the clarity he needed and was feeling more optimistic. After the group traveled to Bimini, he chose Vanessa for a one-on-one date, her second of the season, which obviously irked the others—especially Corinne, who despite her aggressiveness has yet to be granted a one-on-one date.  

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She complained to Rachel and the cameras that Vanessa had no depth, only talking about being a special education teacher and coming from a big Italian family.

(Worth remembering: Corinne seduced Nick in a moonbounce several episodes ago. So deep.)

On their date, Vanessa and Nick went diving and she told him at dinner that she had fallen for him, and Nick, in response, delivered a rambling monologue that left her and everyone watching at home confused.

Next, Corinne, Kristina and Raven went on a group date that involved swimming with sharks. (The sharks weren’t as scary as the floral short shorts Nick was wearing, just saying.) Kristina got freaked out and cried (can’t blame her), and Corinne pouted that Nick wasn’t paying enough attention to her. Raven got the group date rose, cementing a hometown date next week.

Danielle M. had the next one-on-one date, also her second of the season, and the conversation was awkward and stilted from the beginning. There was zero chemistry between them, and I felt like I was watching a repeat of Nick’s date last week with the other Danielle. As soon as Danielle M. started talking about her feelings for Nick, his face just fell. He sent her home, despite assuring her that she was great.

“Not great enough,” Danielle said.

After Danielle left, Corinne decided to go to Nick’s hotel room and try to seduce him, delivering the money quote that we’ve heard repeated all season long in promos.

“My heart is gold—but my vagine is platinum,” she said, causing #platinumvagine to trend on Twitter for a minute.  

But Nick rebuffed her advances, and Corinne stomped off in her Louboutins.

The episode’s third one-on-one date was granted to Rachel, and she and Nick hit up a local bar and chatted about what it would be like for him to meet her family. No, she’d never brought a white guy home before, but she assured him her family is open minded and includes “everybody.”

After their date ended, Nick decided it was time to send one of the remaining women home—and if you guessed it was going to be Corinne, you were very wrong. He decided to let Kristina, the Russian-born dental hygienist with a sad story of growing up in an orphanage, go.

“You didn’t give me a chance,” she said through tears.

Usually, the final four women all get hometown dates, but it’s unclear whether Nick will give roses to Vanessa, Rachel and Corinne (Raven already had a rose from earlier). We’ll have to wait until next week to see if all four get hometowns. Still pulling for Corinne to get one, if only so we can meet her nanny. 

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